Chapter 29-Sit Down

“I’m very good at making a mess Mummy.” And that I can’t deny. From getting paint on the curtains to creating an impenetrable flour paste on the kitchen floor, Raffie is very good at many things, but sitting down is not one of them.

The longest he has remained seated was on his first trip to the circus. Totally overwhelmed, he barely moved for the entire performance, pinned to my lap by the spectacle of clowns, acrobats and trapeze artists. And after slowly peeking out from behind my shoulder he talked about it for weeks afterwards.

Sadly this experience was not recalled during a trip to the pantomime this week. We stayed for all of ten minutes, but even the lovely Tweedy the Clown couldn’t stop the tears. The kindest thing to do was to abort our mission and go and buy him some crisps, and half an hour later he was all smiles. “I love Tweedy Mummy” he informed us as we got into the car, an hour before the panto was due to finish.

So for some reason we took him to the hairdresser this week for his first official haircut. As a hairdresser’s nightmare I always feel a little awkward with hair which refuses to be tamed. Raffie has inherited my obstinate hairdo and his mischievous locks would look odd cut too short, so we have stuck with the Brian Jones look.

Almost seated with a little help.

Almost seated with a little help.

We took him to the hairdressers I was taken to as a child. Times may have changed but it’s still as friendly and welcoming, even for a small boy who only managed to sit down for the time it took him to eat his favourite cheesy biscuit. And two biscuits later we were done.

The difference a cheese biscuit can make.

The difference a cheese biscuit can make.

I struggle just to get Raffie dressed when he’s on the move, but Holly the hairstylist-clearly familiar with the wriggles of toddlers-managed to cut his hair in mid-spin without snipping his ear off.

Not quite the sitting down I had in mind.

Not quite the sitting down I had in mind.

Raffie is already talking about his next visit to the hairdresser, and I am silently hoping that a few months might make all the difference when it comes to sitting down nicely. Otherwise next time we might have to send in the clowns.

Job done.

Job done.


Chapter 28-Can We Fix It?

Ringing in the changes on New Year’s Eve can mean a clean sweep for many. And this year Raffie’s brought himself a rather large broom.

In just a few days he has started potty training, discovered a passion for noodles, and even slept through until 3am for the first time in nearly a year.

And he’s also enjoying some new pursuits. As I struggle to overcome my chocolate demons, Raffie has discovered the joy of fixing, and has been partly inspired by an ill-timed car MOT.

measuring 2

Apparently we have no need to worry about the car. Armed with his toolkit and broom, Raffie insists we don’t need a mechanic and has promised to fix the car himself with his drill and a hammer.

This new found enthusiasm for fixing has been accompanied by taking a spanner to the larder door handle and a drill to the fridge door.

drill 1

The solution to dropping his toys down the back of the radiator is to hit it with a plastic spirit level whereupon they bounce out covered in dust bunnies but ready to be dropped down the back all over again.

It hasn’t all ended well though, after banging the wall so hard it’s left little crescent shaped divots all over the hallway. “Looks like the moon Mummy!” And sadly, Raffie’s actual broom has been temporarily banished following an unfortunate wielding incident involving crockery.

But it’s not all about the toolbox. In December he discovered Ben and Holly’s Little Kingdom and the work of the elves, who too are very good at fixing things. “I’m the Wise Old Elf Mummy,” he beamed at me, while attempting to fix the cupboard door with a water sprayer. “And I am useful.”

And despite variable results, given he has the best of intentions, we can’t really argue with that.

measuring 1


This week I was thrilled to be featured on the first Post Comment Love and Newbie Showcase of 2014. This is part of the lovely Verily Victoria Vocalises website, which is a wonderful read and features lots of other interesting writers. You can find out more here